The Light and the Darkness

Namaste!

I recently had a conversation with my Mum about Universal energies and the balance between the Light and the Darkness.

I have come to believe that there must be balance on earth and within the universe, just like the Yin and Yang symbol. Everything in life has its light and dark energy, we each have our own light side and dark side. And there must be a balance of Karma at the same time. To me, the energies and life itself is all about balance. I believe that this is how our Earth and universe works, it is simply "programmed" that way. We cannot have one without the other.

My Mum on the other hand disagreed, her argument being that she does not believe in the darkness at all. And that there is only light energy, that the dark energies do not exist.

I once heard someone make the comment "those who only choose to focus on the light, are in turn casting their own dark shadow". I found this very intriguing. I have also been hearing other comments about how these people do not believe that there is an energy shift happening at all, as all they seem to see in the world is more death, destruction and crime.

I do respect my Mothers opinions and beliefs, but on this occasion I had to disagree with her. And that is fine as we both have our own views on life and we both respect that.

I do have one question about the Light and the Darkness. We are moving forwards into a new era of consciousness, our vibrations are lifting and we are becoming more and more aware of universal energies. We are moving into the time of the Goddess, the Golden Age, we are shifting and moving at light speed into a place where our heart and brain centres are opening, we are becoming more aware of something that is bigger and higher than ourselves. So my question is "if we are shifting into a time of Light, where the Light is increasing in us all, AND there must be a balance in the Universe. Does this mean that the Darkness is also increasing, that the places and people where Darkness resides is also coming to the forefront?". Will there always be this balance where the Darkness will always be an oposing energy to the Light, and will this energy always be as strong? As we move forwards into the Golden Age, I wonder if there will be parts of this planet and its people that will move forwards into a Dark Age also.

I look around and see many people lifting their vibrations and consciousness. I see an abundance of love and joy all around me, more people are awakening now than ever before. BUT I also see planetary earth shifts, wars between countries, death, rioting, crime etc. With just as many people who are awakening to a time of light and love, I also see people embracing their inner darkness and choosing to follow the darker path.

I have no answer to my questions. And I wonder if others are also asking it? But who would be there to answer? I could ask Great Spirit or my own Spirit Guides, but would my human brain be able to comprehend the answer? Maybe we will just have to wait and see...

Love, Light and Spirit to you all...

My very first Awakening to Spirit (part 2)...

Namaste!

Cont...

I was in a very dark and scary place. I felt alone and distant from everyone, and spent most of my time locked away in my room. I even had a boyfriend at the time who didnt seem to notice too much that I was changing.

Then one day after listening to the dark ramblings of this demonic presence, I finally put two and two together. I realised what had happened with the Ouija Board, myself and my friend. Two entities had obviously came through the portal that we opened and although they didnt make themselves known straight away, they had attached himself to the both of us. I had never believed in dark entities before, but I certainly did now. Even though I was spiritual back then, my awareness, self confidence and vibrations were a lot lower at that time. I was a prime target for any type of negative energies.

I explained to my friend what I thought had happened and she agreed. We worked on smudging her room and made a protection amulate for the doorway of our housing unit. Her entity slowly pulled away from our home, but mine had remained clung to me.

Then one night after laying in bed and not being able to sleep, the entity came to me again. I closed my eyes even tighter thinking that this would block it from my mind, but it didnt. Its face appeared in my minds eye and told me that I would never be rid of it. With tears in my eyes I flung off the covers and walked out to the kitchen. It was pitch black and after midnight. I walked over to the kitchen drawer and pulled out the biggest knife I could find.

I took the knife and walked over to the kitchen window. I held the cold blade to my wrist and cried out loud. I was finally sick of the constant taunting and the dark suggestions the entity was making. He had pushed me to my breaking point, my strength to fight back was finally over. The entity waited quietly as it probably thought I was about to end my life. I had isolated myself from everyone and everything, just what it had wanted.

But instead I said out loud "if there is any reason why I should live, make it known to me NOW". I waited for a response of some kind but nothing happened, so I repeated it two more times. I closed my eyes and listened intently, I actually thought that if there really was a God that he/she was about to speak to me. And it did. After closing my eyes a huge white light appeared to me (in my minds eye). The light was so very bright that I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Then something else happened, I heard a voice, and it was not the entity. This time it was a female's voice and it said "hello my dear, you are finally able to listen. We are here to help you". I found myself surrounded by bright white angel like beings, it was honestly one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. The beings moved in closer and as I looked to my left I could see that they were detaching the entity from me. They took it to the centre of the room and the beings rose up into the air and vanished.

I opened my eyes and the room was still dark. But something was different, the heaviness was gone. I now felt lighter and brighter and I could feel the old me inside again. I was still stunned by what had happened but realised that the white beings must have been my Spirit Guides and Angels. I had felt the oneness of creation that was Great Spirit/God. From that moment onwards my life was going to be different. My perceptions of everything had changed and I no longer felt the feeling of separation. I had started my conscious spiritual journey.

That was my story of the very first time I felt the presence of Great Spirit. It was a time in my life that I really dont think or talk about much, but looking back on it now, it really was a pivital point to my spiritual development.

Love, light and spirit to you all...

My very first Awakening to Spirit (part 1)...

Namaste!

 

I can remember it like it was yesterday. We can probably all remember the very first time we felt the presence of Spirit/God in our lives. For me it was when I was 18 years old and had only just started University. I had always been a spiritual child. I had seen and heard many things that would probably scare the heck out of most people. But I have always been "open" to seeing, hearing and sensing the spirit world. Despite this, I had never really sensed or felt or could even grasp the idea of having a connection with Great Spirit. At that time I was still very disconnected and struggling through life. I just assumed that I was a freak of nature. I wish my first awakening was a happier story, but this was how it happened for me:

** Please if you are frightened easily, or do not wish to hear or read about the dark side of spirituality, then you may not want to read any further **

It all began a few months after moving into the University housing complex. I became friendly with the girl who lived next door to me, who also had an interest in all things psychic and spiritual. We were quite good friends and both dabbled with Tarot Cards and the like, but neither of us had much experience or knowledge about anything of that nature.

One day my friend asked me if I was interested in using a Ouija Board. I was very hesitant at first as I had heard so many horror stories about people using one and things going wrong. Images of The Exorcist movie ran through my head and fears of what may come of it all. I was scared to say the least but looking back on it now, it was a pivital point in my spiritual journey. I eventually caved in and agreed to it.

The next night my friend drew up the Ouija Board on a piece of paper. She had me convinced that she knew what she was doing. By drawing it up on paper she thought that she could burn it at the end and be rid of any energies that may come through. We sat in our hallway with candles and our fingers on the shot glass. There were no forms of psychic protection used, just a few words to invite in a spirit of any kind.

Well after quite a while of trying, nothing happened. We had a good laugh at it all, packed everything up, burnt the paper and went to bed. A few uneventful days had passed before some very strange things began to happen. My friend complained of having terrible nighmares about a tall and melevolent spirit that visited her room every night. I would often wake at night to her screaming and shouting at the spirit to leave her alone. It then started following her during the daytime, and her boyfriend commented that he had started seeing it too. Some kind of entity was certainly attached to her. I on the other hand was experiencing something very different.

I  began hearing a voice and seeing some kind of demonic figure in my minds eye. The voice was male and dark, and the face I kept seeing was dark red and very twisted. It started telling me things that would eventually take away my self confidence and joy. It started with things like "no one likes you" and "you dont have any friends or anyone that cares about you" and "you are a hopeless waste of space". This went on for months and months, and I honestly had no idea what was going on. I knew that if I told someone they would think I was going crazy. So I kept it to myself. Soon the voice got darker and started telling me that "my life was not worth living", and "that I would be better off dead". The voice persisted and its presence overwhelmed me. I soon believed what it was telling me. I started thinking about suicide and fell into a deep and dark depression.

Ok, this story is quite long. So the rest will have to wait for another time....

Don't judge a book...

Namaste!

Don't judge a book by its cover, we've all heard that saying before. But I have noticed some judgement around myself lately that has brought up a few feelings of insecurity. I am a very "natural" woman, meaning I only wear make up on the rare occasion, wear my long fluffy dark hair in a ponytail and spend most of my days wearing track pants and a singlet. I dont wear a lot of jewellery, never wear shoes around home, and only pluck my eyebrows when I can remember. I am certainly not what you would call glamorous :)

In saying all that, I do take some pride in my appearance and try to look my best whenever I can. Its just not a high priority for me at the moment.

Since starting my jewellery business and making pretty things for a living, Ive noticed a recurring theme in my life. I often get a look of astonishment when I tell people I am a jewellery maker. Amongst the different reactions, there has been the "blank stare", the "looking me up and down" and the look of "oh my, she can't be for real". The looks also come with wide eyes and little or no comments afterwards. I think most people expect me to be a gorgeous looking glamazon of a woman, with perfect hair and makeup, wearing a long flowing dress and dripping with jewellery from head to toe. But that just isnt me.

I honestly have a little giggle at myself sometimes. In no way do I ever pretend make a fashion statement or look like the women in magazines. And I dont really even make my jewellery with fashion in mind, I just make things that I think are beautiful, and that are full of healing energies for other women to wear. To most people I probably look like a bogan gypsy woman with no fashion sense what so ever.

Sometimes I tell myself that I should try and come across as a little more.... polished. But in the end I dont particularly care what other people think of me. And I guess we all probably feel a little judged sometimes in regards to our appearance.

I dress for comfort, so I do apologise to anyone who sees me in real life and what you see doesn't match up with what you have expected. The simple beauty that arrises from my creativity comes from the depths of my heart and soul. From a place where I connect with spirit, a sacred place.....

Love, light and spirit to you all....

Awakenings...

Namaste!

So over the past week I've had plenty of time to think and reflect. As they say "everything always happens at once". And this week it has been the health of our family. My husband is currently in hospital hopefully having his gall bladder removed, my toddler son has an ear infection and the flu, and I have also had a nasty cold. With all this happening I have been trying to run a business, keep the house maintained, and hold our little family together. Thank goodness my parents are staying with us for a few days until life returns to normal.


But with us all being unwell, (this is the first time we have all been sick at once) it has certainly given me time to think and reflect about life. It has been a kind of awakening for us all, especially myself and my husband. Looking back on life, I now realise that I have had many many of these "awakenings" or times in my life where things have gone awry and have needed to change. In fact within the last year I seem to have had a lot in comparison to the rest of my life, which I think may have something to do with all the energy shifting occurring at the moment.


This particular awakening obviously has more to do with our lifestyle and health matters. It has been a sort of kick in the bum from the universe I think, telling us that things really need to change at home to improve our state of health as a family. There are lessons with all that has happened this week.One being the obvious, that our lifestyle needs adjusting. Another being that more care and attention needs to be put back into our family life. As a family unit, the family "machine" needs all parts to run effectively. When one cog has broken it effects all other components, and the machine stops working. We certainly need to work more as a team and less as  individual components.

Hindsight is a funny thing. Looking back, there were obvious signs from the universe that our situation needed changing. But they were too easily ignored or not seen at all. But things really needed to happen this way. Our eyes needed opening widely to see the truth of what has been happening and now we can go about making the many changes we need to function better as individuals and as a family. The first change will be going on a health kick and bettering our way of eating. I know my husband is not looking forward to this. He rolled his eyes at me as I told him about the Weight Watchers treats I purchased for him. He will get a big suprise when he comes home hehehe.....

Love, light and spirit to you all....

The Pram and The Smudgestick

Namaste!

Something quite funny happened to me last week at my sons playgroup. But firstly I need to explain something. After that day at Playgroup I have come to another realisation; that I am having difficulties relating and communicating with "unawakened" and ego driven people. My few close friends are all spiritual and it is this reason why we are so close, as we can all relate and talk to eachother about anything without judgement. I have made the choice to have spiritual friends, mainly because I find it hard to keep a friendship going with someone who is driven by ego. These friendships always seem to fizzle out, there is a lack of interest on both sides, a lack of understanding, and most of all a lack of conversation.

This takes me back to the incident at Playgroup. Besides myself, there are about a dozen other mums and dads that attend each week. And again, I seem to be the odd one out. Everyone else has joined a little group, and I am on my own. I sit each week with my son and play, and often the other kids will join in. I don't feel separate from the other parents but I do realise that we are certainly different on many levels.

Each week I tune into some of the converstations and they are always the same. One group talk about their work and how much money they make, its like a little competition between them. Another group always talk about the births of their children; the what, when, and how it all happened. They compare the length of the birth, the difficulty and methods of pain relief. And the stories go on each week in that manner. I could probably jump in and have my say about these things, but that kind of talk just isnt me anymore and it doesnt feed my spirit. In fact, I find that when I do talk about such things, my ego absolutely loves it. My ego loves it when I focus on one of my "stories" especially the ones where I was the victom. I now choose not to feed my ego any of that behaviour. I would rather stay quiet and alone than engage my ego with the energy it craves to stay alive.

Anyway the funny part of the day came when I had to get my sons sippy cup from the pram. Now, I do keep a lot of things in the pram. Including some of my ritual and spiritual "supplies" like crystals, holy water, incense, smudge sticks, sage leaves etc. After all, you never know when your aura needs cleansing. So as I went through the contents of the pram basket, I started pulling out a few items to find the sippy cup. I had a handful of crystals, an incense packet in my mouth, and a whopping big smudgestick on the hood of the pram. I was dropping sage leaves and crystals all over the floor. As I finally found the cup, I looked up to see a dozen eyes starring at me in utter disbelief. Jaws had dropped open and whispers were exchanged. "Sorry" I said timidly as I quickly put everything back into the basket and gave my son his juice. "Oh crap" I thought to myself, Ive probably just labelled myself as the "Playgroup Witch". But I did have a little giggle. In that moment I realised that although I have trouble relating to these people, they probably feel the same way about me. Especially now that they have seen the contents of my life.

Am I really the only mother on earth who carries smudgesticks in their childs pram? Hmmm... Hopefully next week they wont all be waiting for me with a wooden stake and fire torches ;)

Love, light and spirit to you all...

Spiritual Partnerships...

Namaste!

I have lately been thinking about my partnership with my husband and wondering if it is possible to be with someone for a lifetime, spiritually growing and developing together as a couple but also individually. My husband follows a Pagan belief and I follow.... an Eclectic belief system :) We do talk about our spiritual selves occasionally but not as often as I would like. And we dont really share our religions much, other than having a similar view on life. I have my daily spiritual connection and creative outlets, and he goes about his life living by the Pagan ways etc. He practices his beliefs with the way he lives his life, the way he deals with people, his morals and ethics etc, which is fine for both of us and is something I highly admire about him.

But there are times where I wish we could share and develop more spiritually as a couple. Sometimes I feel as though my beliefs and energies are constantly changing with the more I learn and grow, whilst he is happy staying where he is. And although I am very compassionate and understand that he is on his own divine journey, learning and growing at his own pace, I do find it frustrating at times. I think this is because he sometimes misunderstands my ways of thinking about life.

I do know that it may be hard to actually find someone who has a similar spiritual interest as myself, and who will also develop and grow with me at the same pace. In fact this may be highly improbable for most couples. It really is unrealistic of me to expect that of my husband now that I think about it lol.

One huge lesson that this relationship is teaching me is respect, patience and understanding. We all develop spiritually at different speeds and are at different stages of our journey.

I am just grateful that I have found someone who is spiritually awakened who I can share my life with. Afterall, I dont think that Quantum Physics and Universal Laws would be high on the conversation list for most unawakened people. My partner in life would always have to be a special soul to handle a woman like me I think. Hehe.

I once had a short relationship with a very spiritual man, something I had always dreamed of. But that dream turned out to be an unhappy reality. All he seemed to do was eat, sleep and meditate. He never left the house or connected with other people. I soon realised that wasnt for me. There is so much more to life and spiritual development that sitting inside a pyramid all day, that was his journey, not mine.

In saying all that, I also dont believe that a relationship/marriage must last a lifetime. We should never feel pressured to be together just because of a piece of paper or ring. I believe that a couple should stay together as long as you are both happy and for as long as your journey is together.

My husband may not be perfect, but he does bring much needed balance to my life. I am always free to be myself and never have to hide anything. He listens to my ramblings about spirit and is always supportive. And for that I will always be eternally grateful.

Love, light and spirit xx.